i could have just kept my mouth shut. i mean, what you dont know won't kill you right?
but it isn't right that i kept it shut as a secret.
neither do i want the burden of a secret, especially with you.

i dont blame you for thinking that way. really.
i've talked about mindsets a long time ago on this blog, and it's the same case again.
the pple arnd you are like that. what stops you from thinking that i wont be that?

you dont trust me. i know that.
whatever i say will not change that. or remove your doubts and fears.

and even though u keep saying that its my choice, i know that you're not comfortable with it.
is it so hard to say that out?

i dont feel good about this.
and there is a deja vu-y feeling that there will be a backlash.

i dont like this feeling at all.

we have been in and out of it.
i dont know whetherit has made us stronger, or more tired ot this r/s
i hope that there's really something there. and i hope that it lasts.