zzZZzzZzZzzzZ

okay... i know i'm not supposed to blog during school hours.

BUT. i am so sleepy. and its nearing end of the day.

so here i am.


anyway, just to update on a couple of things.

MOS was kinda boring. though baofa and chunsiong both won good stuff. and there was free alcohol. and yizhe was kinda funny in that suit. and i managed to see my fav stitch at chinaone :)
must have been kind of early when the event ended and thus the dance floor was empty. got bored after a while so we left for coffee at starbucks


and you know that there is something really wrong with society when you get harassed by 4 five/six year old boys at work and their conclusion after annoying you for 15 mins over everything from rules that say audience is not allowed in the hall after the event , religion and my job, is that you're not a christian coz your name is Tan Su Hui (as they read from my name tag) and therefore you're bad.
i am so rendered speechless.

though i dont mind being known as the ruler of all evil. haha


and yesterday at the usher training session, i was analysing the dinosaur age rule book

some of the rules on the first page of the first section
1. Ushers should not gamble or smoke while on duty
2. No gathering is allowed
3. Ushers should not make unnecessary phone calls while on duty
4. Ushers should not eat on duty
5. Ushers should remain alert at all times

and blah blah.

i broke like 80% of them. i should so be sacked. hahaha


and i finished playing the whole of chocobos! yay.




okay. i ran out of things to say. lol. i am so cranky now.


i am determined
and i have got no idea what i'm trying to prove.
and yet i dont want it to end at all.
u have no idea how much i wanna put down everything for u when u say stuff like that
but i dont want to fall anymore

and really. all i'm doing at this point of time, is agreeing with what you told me previously.

MSP christmas

Christmas Party is over!

suhui is relieved :)

could have done better on being an emcee though, but well, i'm not really that joker a person to emcee well :(

pictures!

this is me doing last min preparation

me picking up my christmas gift. ( all the presents were sponsored by a variety of pple, from stanley to chewy to daniel to joe wilson to "steve" and "bill" and even DARSIM!)

yizhe looking for my present. which is so big they can't find it

My "big" christmas present, sponsered by nick

luppy says to email him to say thanks

my dinner table

group photo!

and my most fav photo of the night!
joe wilson, senior director, and our MSP cup!
thanks luppy for taking this for me

it's been fun.

another round on Weds at MOS :)

pple

this is the reason why i'm getting fat.

seriously dunno what's wrong with them lor.

one, refuses to give up. i mean, it's been more than a year. you should have gotten the point by now that things are DIFFERENT now. and just because i respond to your msges regarding school and stuff doesn't mean that we're still friends. and it definitely doesn't mean that i'm going to change my mind about telling you what went wrong the last time. at the end of the day, it doesn't matter whether i tell u why i have been ignoring you for so long. you have your life and your gf. i have mine. whether you know or not, doesn't change a thing. so seriously, stop bothering me and spend the time u use to think about this over and gone issue on your gf and your studies. sheesh.

the other, hai. i dont even know where to start. we have been through so much, parted so many times. and now, even though we're back together, i'm waaay beyond caring so much about what you do. which is kinda sad. but really. i dont know what i'm doing, and how i feel when it comes to trying to make us work anymore. and everything you say, doesn't make me feel any better. it's like, they are gorgeous and pretty and whatever. and me? i'm just me. i guess at the end of the day, i'm always the inferior one.

things have been so crappy. hai

sucks

its always at a wrong timing.

though i must say i was mentally prepared since that night. though it doesn't help that there's so many things i need to settle at the same time.

keep getting flashbacks of what happened. even in my sleep. which is really disturbing. it's my fault, u know it, and i know it. what u say, that u dont blame me and stuff like that, doesn't really matter.

and the main reason why i'm letting go, is not because of the lifestyle issue, but because i know it will never be the same again
i don't wanna say anything else regarding u anymore.

this time it's different.
it hurts me to say this and i'm not even sure whether u will be reading this and probably at the back of my head i'm thinking the exact opposite of what i'm going to say but i hope u wont talk to me for the time being.
coz when this kinda thing happens whatever u say usually gets me a) even more upset or b)all flared up. and i can't do this when u talk to me. actually it's more like i stop functioning totally, like what happened during the meeting at MS.

time is moving exceptionally slow today. doesn't help that i forgot to bring my ds out so i spent the whole journey listening to music, trying to persuade my head to stop throbbing coz i really didn't have a good sleep, and feeling crappy whenever it gets to the lovey-dovey songs, which i skip once the first verse ends. think time is having fun kicking my ass today. haiz. just want this to be over asap.

"Time flies.
Time waits for no man.
Time heals all wounds.
All any of us wants is more time.
Time to stand up.
Time to grow up.
Time to let go.
Time."